Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Coming to Terms with Autism

I'm still coming to terms with all of it.

All of it being, autism.  And if I'm being honest, I'm afraid.  I'm scared of the forever of this disorder.

I just stare into my child's eyes, hoping I'm teaching him, hoping I'm helping him, hoping it's effective.  It being my ability to connect.

I get anxious when I let myself worry about Aksel's future.  When I ask 'will he' questions.  Like:

Will he assimiliate?  
Will he have friends?  
Will he attend normal kindergarten classes?  (our current goal) 

I just want as every other parent in the world prior to me has already said (or thought), "I just want more for my child than I had."

Or something like that...

On a different note, I didn't list the positives from our diagnosis appointment last week.

What our doctor complimented Aksel for:

  • for not being a picky eater
  • for not experiencing sleep difficulties
  • for not refusing affection or touch

If I haven't ever said it, I have a sweet, sensitive child who loves to be touched, tickled, played with. Only difference, he's not talking, pointing, or participating in situations of joint attention

Regardless, I love my child for who he is.  Autism, or not.

I'm just learning to accept it, graciously.

PS - We have our first appointment with BabyNet tomorrow.

PPS - Will you please, please, please vote for my blog below?

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1 comment:

  1. babynet is GREAT! Take any & all help they offer, even if you don't think you need it. Any services he qualifies for might help when it comes time to write an IEP for kindergarten.


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